Como lo olvido? How do I forget him?

[Boricua_Princess]

I fell in love like many do, and instead of this story having a happy ending, I ended up hurt. I actually get upset with my self evertime I think about him, becuase he doesn't deserve it.

Typical story: he cheated with his neighbor and not only did he not tell me himself, his sister, thinking he already had mentioned it, started talking about it one day and her face almost dropped to the floor when I told her I didn't know what she was talking about.

When I told him I knew, he freaked out and said that he was upset, not because I knew, but because he was the one that was supposed to tell me, not anyone else. The NERVE of him!!!

He asked me to forgive him many times and I tried but I knew that I would be doubting him all the time and that would make me miserable, and in the long run he would be miserable too by me always judging him, and he kept saying he was only human and that it was a "MISTAKE". Ha ha ha. How do you like that one?

No matter how much I have tried, "EVERYTHING" around me reminds me of him, even the things that aren't related! After everthing happened, my cousin told me that her nephew had seen him in a Sandwich Diner and when he asked what he was doing there he said he was waiting for his girlfriend! And since my cousin didn't know I had ended everything he asked him about me, and he simply said "Oh she left me" and acted as though he didn't care. Damn him! I really hate loving him so much. HELP ME PLEASE! I need to get over him.

What to do?

[This message has been edited by Boricua Princess (edited 26 May 2000).]

[This message has been edited by Boricua Princess (edited 26 May 2000).]

[davidFreedom]

You know you will not get over him completely, it was a matter of trusting your heart. You were never wrong to love him. You know yourself time will heal the wound, but the scar will remain. Beleive it or not, you will grow from this experience. My heart goes out for you.....this is a hug from a stranger,from David. xo

[ERIC_SANTIAGO]

This story reminds me of my first love way back when I was in high school.
We were unseperable of course, and we were a cute couple together. But as the saying goes, "nothing lasts forever". She ended up playing on me with some pot-head loser. Naturally I was upset and I broke up with her. But even still after a year of being apart I would still think of her. Partly because I didn;t trust any other woman enough to get close enough to have a relationship with. I isolated myself and if you are not careful you will do the same thing.
So the best thing that you can do to forget about him is see other people without any type of commitments until you are ready and have found someone you would like to go steady with.

Originally posted by Boricua Princess:
I fell in love like many do, and instead of this story having a happy ending, I ended up hurt. I actually get upset with my self evertime I think about him, becuase he doesn't deserve it.

Typical story: he cheated with his neighbor and not only did he not tell me himself, his sister, thinking he already had mentioned it, started talking about it one day and her face almost dropped to the floor when I told her I didn't know what she was talking about.

When I told him I knew, he freaked out and said that he was upset, not because I knew, but because he was the one that was supposed to tell me, not anyone else. The NERVE of him!!!

He asked me to forgive him many times and I tried but I knew that I would be doubting him all the time and that would make me miserable, and in the long run he would be miserable too by me always judging him, and he kept saying he was only human and that it was a "MISTAKE". Ha ha ha. How do you like that one?

No matter how much I have tried, "EVERYTHING" around me reminds me of him, even the things that aren't related! After everthing happened, my cousin told me that her nephew had seen him in a Sandwich Diner and when he asked what he was doing there he said he was waiting for his girlfriend! And since my cousin didn't know I had ended everything he asked him about me, and he simply said "Oh she left me" and acted as though he didn't care. Damn him! I really hate loving him so much. HELP ME PLEASE! I need to get over him.

What to do?

[This message has been edited by Boricua Princess (edited 26 May 2000).]

[This message has been edited by Boricua Princess (edited 26 May 2000).]

[Boricua_Princess]

David,

Thanks for the hug and your heart going out to me, yet I hope you don't feel pitty over me, I don't pitty me myself. To be honest, I don't regret anything that happened, because now I know to what extent I'm willing to love someone, with what intensity and passion. (Am I crazy? Do you think I should regret it so that I'll never want to be with him again, or do you think that if I did regret it, it would be harder to forget him?) I know that he'll never find anyone like me (which I made abundantly clear to him) but even if he did, I guess it doesn't make a difference anymore, and in a way, though I wish it could have lasted longer, I'm glad it ended when it did, because in the long run I would have been hurt so much more, since we had actually talked about getting married. I've actually thought about what you said before. I know that the scar and the memories (whether good or bad) will remain through all eternity and I say to myself all the time "What doesn't kill me will make me stronger" and I believe that, I really do. But, God, it's hard, you know. I know, like you said, I'll get over it, but that doesn't make it any easier. And well, I guess I'll just have to let time pass but I'm so scared of seeing him again and I really hope that when I do see him again everything will have passed, and that I won't feel anything at all. But I have to ask, what did you mean by "You know you will not get over him completely, it was a matter of trusting your heart." Why do you think I'll never get over him? Even if I fall in love with someone else?

Eric,

I guess you know where I'm coming from also. I'm really sorry you had to go through that, I'm not sure how long ago that happened to you but like Dave said, "My heart goes out to you" too. How long did it take you to get over her and how did you do it? What made you trust women again? (I take it she didn't leave you traumatized, did she?) Personally,I've hanging out with many friends of my friends and meeting new people. I try not to isolate myself and though sometimes I need my solitude, I try not to be alone most of the time, and I have to say that I still believe in true love, which is good (call me an idealist--that's exactly what I am). I believe when I find the right person, he'll love me as much as I love him. Knowing that all men aren't the same, I also believe that love reaches you when you least expect it and when you don't search for it, though I have to admit that I am kind of scared of finding it and not knowing what to do with it, I agree with you, you do get kind of frightened. So right now, as I mentioned before, I just make new friends, and maybe (hopefully) in the future I'll meet the love of my life and spend the rest of my life with him and we'll make each other happy, porque yo pa' vestir santos no me quedo. No, no, no, no, no. He he he.

Thanks guys, I really appreciate your support and the advice. Even the smallest detail helps.

[PRsweetie]

Mija: Dont be so hard on your self eveyone falls in love at one time in their lives. I too was hurt by someone, that I loved and I thought he loved me and he too cheated. You will get stronger as the days go by, I have. You just need to tell yourself that you are better off with out him, if he really loved you he would have never hurt you in any way. Because love does not hurt. Now think about yourself and getting your heart to where you want it to be. Youm are beautiful Puerto Rican woman and you will find the man of your dreams that will love and cherish you. It takes time to get over a broken heart. And if he is in a Diner waiting for his girl and he is over you already then you really dont need that ass in your life. Do you girl. That's a saying I learned from a friend of mine. Which means basicly It's all about you now. Take care of yourself, and most of all love yourself, cuz if you dont who will?

[Boricua_Princess]

PRsweetie,

Thank you for your words, I know you're right and I also know the main reason why I ended the relationship was because I thought to myself, I don't deserve this, I'm too good for this, cuz' I love myself and in reality I DON'T NEED THAT ASS IN MY LIFE!--Your friend was right, I'm glad you listened. That's something that I'm really proud to say! Thank you for pointing that out to me. Appreciate it!

[davidFreedom]

.....you will get over a love but never forget, that doubt you will always know..