An earlier post
Latin Mama,
In response to an earlier about your ex, I wrote the following:
Wait. Don't rush into marriage.
Don't get married to someone just because they want to marry you. You need to marry them because you are in love with them. It may feel good that someone wants to marry you, but they may want to marry you for the wrong reasons. This may especially be true if you don't have similar feelings about them. If you are thinking about your independence and not your ex, chances are you are not as emotionally involved or in love with him. Marrying him would only make matters worse. Marriage won't make your feelings of independence going away. You have to feel like you can't live without this guy and then marriage would be appropriate. Otherwise, you will feel discontent, trapped, and needing to be free. This will only hurt him in the long run and prevent you from growing as an individual (and possibly meeting someone who you truly love).
Although I believe that interracial marriages can work, expect that the cultural diffences can be mentally exhaustign, can can mutually disrespect for each other and, depending on his specific cultural beliefs, be demeaning to you. You should consider this fact and realize that if you have to be willing to work hard in order to overcome any cultural differences. They simply do not go away on their own. If you are willing to marry this guy only because he wants to marry you, the cultural differences will be magnified if difficulties arise in the marriage.
Nachos.
P.S. - I noticed that you did not say you were totally in love with your ex or that you always wanted to marry him. Is that true and you just didn't say it. If not, then maybe you should rethink things and why you are with him.
So, tell us what happened with your ex and why it was not working out.
Nachos.
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I never heard...
4th August 2001, 21:23
Hi Nachos
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