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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 18th March 2001, 20:32
New_2_PR New_2_PR is offline
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Hello everyone. I am in a unique situation and I need some info/advice from the native PR's. About a year ago I met a girl from PR online. We talked for about 8 months and we decided for her to move here to the United States to live with me. She wanted to leave because of her mother and she did not like her life there in PR. Towards the end of the year I met someone where I am and broke it off with the girl from PR. Well, she decided to move here anyway to live with a friend. She did not tell her family she was leaving. My other relationship ended and I decided to meet her for the first time. After a month of spending time with her, I fell in love with her and want her to live with me. This is a big decision for the both of us ( I have no asked her to move in yet ) but I am worried about her family. She has spoken with a couple of different family members but no her father, since she has moved here. She is afraid if she tells her father the truth he will make her come home, to PR and she does not want to leave the United States and I do not want to lose her. Now that you know this, here is what I want to know.
What do I need to do to make her family accept me?
She is 24 and Pentecostal, I am 24 and Baptist. I have a great job and can support her until she gets on her feet but if her father finds out she is living with a man, out of marriage, she says that would really upset and hurt him.
Is there anything I need to know about her culture to help me in this situation. I think I may have to fly down there to meet him and explain to him that I love her and want to be with her but I do not want to marry her right now.From what she says is that she cannot live with a man unless they are married, which is not what she wants but what her father wants. She loves him very much and does not want to hurt him. Is there any advice, comments, anything I need to know from any of you to help me.

Muchos gracias
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Old 10th April 2001, 08:10
Colon-RodriguezFamilyTree Colon-RodriguezFamilyTree is offline
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Colon-RodriguezFamilyTree
Wink Many questions emergency situation

Quote:
Originally posted by New_2_PR
Hello everyone. I am in a unique situation and I need some info/advice from the native PR's. About a year ago I met a girl from PR online. We talked for about 8 months and we decided for her to move here to the United States to live with me. She wanted to leave because of her mother and she did not like her life there in PR. Towards the end of the year I met someone where I am and broke it off with the girl from PR. Well, she decided to move here anyway to live with a friend. She did not tell her family she was leaving. My other relationship ended and I decided to meet her for the first time. After a month of spending time with her, I fell in love with her and want her to live with me. This is a big decision for the both of us ( I have no asked her to move in yet ) but I am worried about her family. She has spoken with a couple of different family members but no her father, since she has moved here. She is afraid if she tells her father the truth he will make her come home, to PR and she does not want to leave the United States and I do not want to lose her. Now that you know this, here is what I want to know.
What do I need to do to make her family accept me?
She is 24 and Pentecostal, I am 24 and Baptist. I have a great job and can support her until she gets on her feet but if her father finds out she is living with a man, out of marriage, she says that would really upset and hurt him.
Is there anything I need to know about her culture to help me in this situation. I think I may have to fly down there to meet him and explain to him that I love her and want to be with her but I do not want to marry her right now.From what she says is that she cannot live with a man unless they are married, which is not what she wants but what her father wants. She loves him very much and does not want to hurt him. Is there any advice, comments, anything I need to know from any of you to help me.

Muchos gracias
You are 24 years old and so is she, Your lady friend should be able to make her own decisions by now without family members being involved, unless they perceive danger.
Pentecostal and Baptist religions are similar in many ways, do your research on that and then you should be the one contacting her family. You should be man enough to be able to speak with them.
Did you ask her to marry you!
It is frowned upon both religions for couples to live together with out the blessing of God.
That is where you problem may lie!!!
Puerto Ricans still have the notion that the young lady who falls in love with a young man, MUST speak to mom and dad about her love interest, then you must approach them for visitation rights. Believe it or not this does still exist in all Spanish speaking countries.
They will be upset with her for a while, but then they’ll come around.
Good Luck

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Old 11th April 2001, 16:41
New_2_PR New_2_PR is offline
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Hey


She is here in Arkansas now. Her family is coming to she her and she does not want for them to see her because she is lying to them.
Anyway, I hope for the best.

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Old 7th May 2003, 09:01
Womanonline Womanonline is offline
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Womanonline
Answer to your question

I am a Puerto Rican female who can give you some insight. The girl you claim to love is Puerto Rican, she has a family who obviously loves her and wants the best for her. She also has a religion that is very similar to yours. Putting all that together, it is obvious that if you or her have any convictions and truly believe in your religions, then you should follow the rules that come with them. Otherwise you will be a hipocrite. Also, regardless of whether you "love" her or not, this does not change her culture. You have stated that you feel no obligation towards her and do not intend to commit to her, a.k.a. marriage. If all you want is permission to sleep with her, convince her to bend her moral beliefs so that you may be "happy" and in the process destroy her relationship with her parents and family with lies and deceit,then dump her later on,I must then say that you are very selfish and really don't know what love is. A Puerto Rican woman can make any man very happy. Why not do things the right way, with respect, and protect her honor, her relationship with her family, and show her that you are also worthy of respect? Like a real man would.
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