I want to improve my English...

[Suki]

To Stanley and Eddier1:

Stanley first off thanks for your concern. I hope with time, I become less of a bounder. At least in the written form. I think when writing I use more emotion than I should in truth. And frankly I think Eddier1 is right. The Communist women are treasures, beautiful, intelligent and strong. And cope with problems so well. Gotta work on someday becoming completely objective, especially if I become a parent someday. Lol. Cuz I think objective philosophy folks are excellent parents. And that is important. I also underestimated and did not understand Eddie's ex-Roman Catholic past. And how my writings. WHICH I OFFICIALLY apologize to Eddie about affected him. And I no longer think I can make it up to him. I am glad I can never harm him ever. He has his philosophy and his community there. With many people all with the same strong values. Es bonito eso. But, maybe with time Stanley, and my working and thinking hard about the things Ed mentions with such wisdom about not going outside our clear fountains of reason. I will work on it, little by little. Until I can finally say "no attachments, and no emotions are affecting this". Of course I know Eddie is a human being. And such a strong one. Such a strong one. I wish I had one tenth of his strength. I would be lucky. Stanley uno tiene que aceptar lo que uno no puede ser. I am deeply surprised Stanley. I never knew Eddie could be sweet talked into anything. It seriously never occurred to me. But, I see I can't sweet talk him really. Too many steel thinking in there. I like his steel thinking. I think I always will. Sigh.

Truth be known. My husband, spends his time on the puter learning Chinese. Thinks I should spend a lot less time on pr.com and write more 'productive' things. And I think he is right. He is hard to say no to. And Eddie's provocative posts of the sort to bring him out of hiding is not all that effective. Lol. He is too objective to care what people say on the internet forums. He attempted that post cuz Mom is entertained and requested it, and he adores her. Lol. She put in a response, a poem to him. She cares deeply for him too. And mom does not tolerate wimpy men. Lol. El Pastelero is a pun. Cuz pasteles are made from Yautia, yuca and platano verde. And since Mom chose a food nickname. So did he. Lol. I am gone. For a while. Too many responsibilities now, time is a luxury. But, I finally see how I am a strange one to Eddie. And I did not take it personally at all. I think my objectivity hopefully is kicking in with him. Cuz he is a special person. Yet, common too. All the qualities I need to develop and get better. He reminds me a bit of my old ballet teachers. No-nonsense, tough, critical, pushing one to improve and do things the right way. You might see it as cruel at first. But it is not, they prepare you for life and sacrifices. And what is more concerned than that?

Good night gentlemen.

Suki.

[Edited by Suki on 1st July 2003 at 06:11]

[Leticia_g]

I entered this topic because I saw my name and comments about my move to Florida. Eddie you are so right concerning Arizona being a better state for individuals with upper respiratory problems. The facts are that my doctor actually had recommended Arizona for me, however my husband's illness was my main concern. This was what my decision was based on.. My husband didn't want to leave the East coast and he had to be in a warm climate. Florida won only because it was his favorite state for vacationing and it so happen to be in the east.

He is very happy about the move because he loves soaking in the sun. I am happy only because I know he is happy and that is my ultimate goal.

One day, maybe I will move west, only time will tell, for now I will bask in the sun and care for my husband.

Cuidense todos. Muchos recuerdo a todos!

[boogieWoogie]

Well I think we have the same needs and together we can learn from each other.I will teach you English as you help me in spanish.Its a great deal.I have already been teaching a french fried of mine here as he taught me French.Lets do it as soon as I get your reply.My email address is Bogzie@mail.com.Waiting.

[Suki]

[quote]Originally posted by Eddier1
[b]
There is no excuse for her posting that scathing and scurrilous post in the General Personals; why she did it? Is it because I would not lay down and let her call me anything she wanted to in private? I don't know what emotions she has as a woman dictated her to do that. I told her a long time ago that woman is a mystery to me; why they act the way they do and talk the way they do is incomprehensible to me. And it will perhaps always be that way to me. However, no sweat, as I know how to stay within myself and not transgress beyond the boundaries of my human understanding.


________________________________________________________

Suki: I thought about that personals post and re-read it with more objectivity and time. And I think my reply now is going to be the hardest one I have ever had to make in pr.com. For me it has been very hard to reply today. But I am compelled to. For I think I am running out of time. I posted that general personals post Eddie, because I felt so REJECTED by you. And I doubt a single person in all the world likes feeling rejected. Especially by someone who I have such admiration and respect for. Eddie, you are an older gentleman with so much experience in life. And you have such a lovely dedication to your ideology. Eddie, I have always found you incredibly handsome. In thought, behavior in the sense of being true to your principles. I don't like all the mudslinging posts, but I realize you cope with what you cope with. And I truly feel green with envy of your friends in Communism. I do. Lol. That post was to make you rethink your rejection of me. And just accept me as a fellow independentista. Now, I realize it was wrong. And inappropriate. For it had my personal feelings mixed in there as well. I so wanted to be close to you in some way. I always enjoy bright, intelligent people. And you definitely qualify as one. How, I would have enjoyed cooking for you, and watching movies with you, reading to you and having you read to me. just talking and being acquaintances or friends of long standing. But this medium and your lifelong values and principles that have stood by you and made you strong through thick and thin, and who you are faithful to at all times, dictated that you not allow those who do not live your philosophy and are committed on a daily basis to that philosophy to be allowed any kind of closeness. It is wise to do such a thing (and I am looking at it now exclusively through your perspective now) and not mine anymore. For the batallas and the pain from those batallas you have done made your choices clear. Entiendo ahora. The fascists will never get you ever. You are victorious already. And always will be.

I hope you forgive me for wanting to be close to you Eddie. I am that way. But not anymore. Not anymore. I am reflecting deeply now. And like a pond I must allow what is in the consciousness to flow to the surface and flow out. And therefore, allow a clear and new flow happen, unimpeded by the past anymore. I think you will like the change. Lol. I won't mention this again. And I won't even know if you read this post. I hope you at least acknowledge it. But if you don't that is allright. Communism what do I think of it? I think it emerged from man's intellect and the age of reason and enlightment FRANCE. Gracchus. Many say terrible things about it. But the truth is, RELIGION and ORGANIZED religion in general has failed humanity in so many respects. Communism comes from reason, and science. And as such it is a stable and worthy philosophy to follow and is results oriented. It is based on those things nature is based on. And has a natural elegance. People fail the philosophy in many respects because they fail to follow all of its tenets with consistency. YOU give it 100% and that is why I admire you Eddie. And why I find you handsome. Your courage, your dedication. Not allowing all the crap that has come down the pike your way for the last 50 years has not swayed you. Just made you stronger and stronger. Strength in men who have had enormous obstacles and pressures directed towards them and not caved under the weight, but come out with a way of overcoming. That is soooooooo attractive to me, beautiful and admirable. And I find men such as you Eddie. Extremely hermosisimo. Thus my desire to be close somehow. In some way. Friendship wise. For I have my husband ofcourse. Lol. But whoever woman you have loved. She was lucky. For I sense that fire as well. And I think you would be most considerate and protective of a wife, if you had one. I don't know. And don't care to know any personal details. Too many low lifes running around willing to destroy that which is precious in others. I don't blame you for your privacy.

All that general personals post was deep hurt on my part over being rejected by you. PUNTO. And I guess the cursing out as you say in our emails was also all about or preventing feeling rejected by you (over my classes) or you saying something which I took as me being seen as an inferior person by you.

Now, I finalize this post. I want you to know, I give you a kiss on each of your cheeks, and I kiss the palm of your hand. Like I would someone I truly care for deeply. For I do. Eres hermoso, precioso y especial. And may all your Communist community keep you close and be proud of having such a lovely senior member in their ranks. For you are a treasure. Eddie hermoso. Eddie inteligente. Eddie luchador. Eddie puertorriqueno. And that is my final thought for you. I won't address you again without your specific permission.

Vida.

[Stanley]

Ed:

Je pense qu'elle est dans l'amour avec vous

[Suki]

You are chismoso. Lol. D'Accord je aime Eddie. Por quoi? Entre nous, il est belle homme, tres bonne et un homme de vere. Pero no estoy enamorada. Lol. Solamente....estoy adolorida por su rechazo de una buena amistad. Pero, entiendo su logica. Y la respeto. Obviously, he does not care for my confessions of wanting to be friends. He would if I decided to become a communist woman. Then I think he would be the best friend on planet Earth. Truly I do. But, I can't change my deepest convictions Stanley. Especially when he has no idea of my experiences that have led me to my convictions. But, he is one damn attractive man. He truly is.

And no more writing about him. He has ignored me enough. Lol. I am going to write some interesting things tomorrow. All intellectual. And non-personal from now on. Check them out if you like.

Suki. Stanley, I think if I wanted to be your internet friend and spoil you rotten like I would have adored doing to Ed, you would have not said no. Lol. Lol. You always make me laugh Stanley with your commentary.

[Stanley]

Il est aliéné, je vous accueillerait dans mes bras.

I think Ed does not like it when I call him an android, but he is pretty close to be a Mr. Data. At this stage intimacy is something that he cannot handle very well because he has to open his heart and expose his emotional turnmoil. I think he has issues---------

However, don't give up. In many ways I think he welcomes the adulation and the "piropos".