Q&A to all Eddier1 questions about anything....right here.

[Suki]

Eddie,
I started this thread to address any questions you may have about anything. My family, my job, my politics, my problems, my etc. I am thinking you do care about me on a human level. That last post in open board convinced me of that. I am grateful you wrote it. Go ahead and be direct about anything at all. After you get your answers. You can make any decision you are comfortable with about me. Choose whatever you want to happen with our online acquaintanceship and I will follow that decision. OK?

If you don't want to ask me questions....since I have 'burdened' you with my family problems....I hope you realize when you said that....I realized you care about me and my family. And what happens to us. So, for all effects and purposes you have every right in the world to ask questions. You are not the unjust Maitreyas as you say. You deserve honest with no vascilation answers. I will give them to you. If you want answers. I am taking a risk with you. But I think I have already been too revealing in this medium anyway. Whatever consequences happen because of it. I have to have the maturity to accept it now. All actions have consequences don't they? I got to accept mine.

Don't think me arrogant, haughty or cruel Eddie. I have never, ever been that. Truly. Are you filled with point blank questions? I will answer them all...if I don't it is because I don't have the time right away...but will get to them. Eventually. And hmmmm. I beg to differ with your assessment of me as the hardest kind of woman to change...do you mean an emotional woman? I write with great attention to constructing words in a way in which feelings are easy to detect and percieve and identify with. I do that because I enjoy playing creatively with emotionally charged words. I want to write creating characters Ed. And good writers dominan el idioma suficiente para crear atmosferas emocionales. I did not know I was doing a good job until I started getting feedback from people like Jose NEstor, Letty, and others. You, on the other hand don't critique literature or writing and keep comments of any emotional nature brief. Though I have gotten hints you do feel what I am writing about through a couple of comments you have made over the years. One of them has been that line about the fragrance of my husband's skin from one of the old philosophy threads....long ago....I thought, "Why did Eddie remember that?!" I even forgot I wrote that. And then I realized. It was an incredibly sensual image. And it captured a certain feeling we have all had in life. I made an impression there.

Why mention all this? Well, I think all that experimental writing on this forum I have been doing, has made you have doubts about my ability to be reason based and logical and scientific. And might be an impediment to me accepting Marxist and Leninist and Maoist thought about society and economy and politics. That is not correct. I hope you also noticed my rational and analytical side....too. And I hope you see I have a sense of working with reason too. And letting reason be the leader in my chariot....you are extraordinary Eddie. I hope you decide to continue this thread with me. I leave March 12th...won't be back for atleast a week or more. Don't know how long it might take so I can't predict. But I will be back and see how you are faring on pr.com.

Please give me a sign that you read this. And that you understand what I said. ANYTHING you write with honesty, I will read and I will answer any question, ABOUT anything at all con honestidad. Hey, I have been fingerprinted, processed and grilled these last few months. Who I am is an open book to the powers that be. I won't mind tough questions from someone like you Eddie. Someone who I realize now, really does give a damn if I live or die.
Suki.

[Edited by Suki on 9th March 2004 at 20:23]

[Eddier1]

Where to begin, oh yes as you suggest with point blank questions, and I do have one, even though I am darn tired with the royal battle I am having with GingerAlex and her TERRORIST ORGANIZATION. So I will try to make this brief, if not terse for sure.

First let me say, that I opine that Stan the Physician is capable of 'bracketing his foolishness' and being professional with you about the health problems of your husband. I know,...I know he was callous and insensitive in the extreme about your marriage issue of getting children, and even wanted to give instructions to your husband on how to have sex with you. However, that issue was not really a health issue, since not having children does not mean that a female is unhealthy. You appear to be quite healthy with all the meditation and exercises you do daily. The exercise it seems flows over to your husband too. He must exercise each and every day to maintain the proper weight and muscle tone for his height. And there has been no indication from you that he is overweight, but is instead right for his height and body type.

Now, after the bombshell of your announcement that he has a brain tumor, you found that he is losing weight, what because he needs too as being overweight and continues exercising but is now losing weight?? I say this because you are not naive about health issues, and you have proved that by many posts in which talk about such things, and also about the proper diet and naturapathic remedies also. Even a layman like me, who is at times quite hermetically sealed as to my emotions, was alerted that losing weight is a serious sympton when one has a pre-cancerous condition. I say farther that no doctor in his right mind would ask your husband to lose weight when he has a tumor. But you hinted that your husband doesn't want to say yes or no with respect to the fact that he must have brain surgery. He doesn't want to alarm you perhaps. And I think you said if what he is doing is alright with him, then it is alright with you. Ooops, not so. You got to take charge; it is better to know and deal with the issue, since you are still not the one who is seriously ill. And anyone with a tumor intercranially, even if it is still benign is at least seriously ill and needs others to guide him.

I think it would be prudent that you not ignore anything about him, even if he wants you to. Really, I had hoped that Stan and you could have put your differences about politics, social issues, and economics aside, BRACKET THEM ALL FOR THE DURATION, and that he would have offered sound advice. He seemed to be disposed to that when he heard the bad news by what he said about the precancerous, and how he asked you immediately whether the tumor was intercranial or external on the head. He showed rapid interest in a medical way, and in one of his latest posts still seems to tend to want to help you, if you would just bracket the other stuff, and not get angry with your memories over how he has treated you and your mom in the past.

Ufff!, if I go on anymore, I will get exhausted. But this is to let you know that I am here, and will return later after I rest and get some light and nourishing food and beverage into me. C ya later tonight Suki, after 11PM probably.

Till then I remain,
Eddie R.

[Suki]

Eddie,

My husband loves bread and butter...and many things of that nature. And he has gained a little weight. About 20 pounds since last fall. I also think he is allergic to wheat. But he doesn't want to accept it. He loves his pan frances and super cargado cafe latino in the morning. He reminds me of another Puerto Rican gentleman. Lol. YOU. With the coffee.

Since he is doing a lot of Aikido and trying for a black belt with a personal expert on it, who out of liking for him gives him one on one attention and throws him to the mat having the excess weight on him makes the falls uncomfortable. I told him he needs to cut off the carbs. And see if he is allergic to wheat. He stopped eating wheat for four days. And felt much better. His sinuses cleared up. And he lost 4-5 pounds. In terms of his brain tumor Eddie. It is bad news. And good news too. His tumor is not growing. It is staying stable. But it is located so deep in the brain the doctors say it is extremely dangerous to operate on. And he will have to live with it. Or risk some serious consequences. I never would have known about it or he either. If he hadn't have to have had a CAT scan to determine if his head was affected in a rearender accident he had a while back and the insurance company of the other guy hadn't insisted on evidence before paying for his 'pain and suffering'. In the CAT scan the tumor showed up. They told him and he went in for additional tests. We didn't know if it was growing and or cancerous. I was freaking out over that stuff. As you know, he is so forgetful about little things. Keys and getting the wrong ingredients about groceries I write on a list, forgetting debit cards in places, not remembering PIN numbers to ATM cards, lots of stuff like that. I would scold him for his lack of memory and I felt so bad....thinking maybe it was the tumor that was affecting it, and I was blaming him for something he could not control. He lied to me about telling me it wasn't important. That it would disappear by itself. I think he did not want me to worry about him too. Like I had about mom. And he was afraid that would impede him being considered for fatherhood. Oh Eddie, I would stick with him no matter what. Es el amor de mi vida. And the only man I have ever been with. Let me not get too emotional. I know you think it kind of foolish. So, I approach the subject of getting him to see specialists. He refuses. I don't know what to think. Should I force the issue? I pay a lot to have him on my health plan...it is the only real reason I stay where I am. I can make more money somewhere else. But it has a good health plan, and I like my co-workers and my boss is very nice. Not like that other tipa loca....from some other job I had. And that one paid more too. But this job atleast has really good dental insurance and health insurance. Though this year it went sky high, with less specialists...such as what he needs. I think I need to call in the troops. Mom and the entire family to pressure him to tell us what is going on. It might be I will have to accept it is inoperable. But the doctors told him that there are people who live their whole lives without trouble with tumors that are benign but unremovable.

GingerAlex I told you she was rabid statehooder loca. But no, you had to take her side...I was being hard on her. Lol. GingerGringa wants to kill populares. Military minded statehooder brainwashed woman. I did not like her comments about her not being puertorriquena. And her other nutty commentary. But hey, I know you did not know the woman.

Anything else you want to know, I will answer Eddie. About Stanley. He won't say anything another doctor won't say, and he is impeded by not having the Xrays and the additional information.

You may ask anything in this thread and I will answer you. I promise. I wish I could do the same to you. But I know I can't. See you later tonight.




Ginger gringa w

[Eddier1]

Well, the least first: GingerA.. At the time I had not read her terroristic post, perhaps you had done so. But the issue was complicated by your angry attacks on Da_Realest who I knew to be a black man, who was expressing his personal experiences of persecution from racism for being a black man. And when he spoke the sorrowful words of don't judge him until you have walked in his shoes, I was convinced that we were dealing with a poor deeply hurt human being. He was seeking help and confirmation of his pains over racism whereever he could find it. He felt the P.Rs were not aware that they too were on the road to being racists, and actually classified them as such.

But he did not take into account their minority status AND the fact that they are a colonized people which the blacks are not. Yes the blacks were once slaves, but never colonized as a nation. He spoke quite calmly and cooly for a black under a storm of criticism and even word bashing. That is why I said what I did to show some empathy with his plight, although I don't agree with his views on racism.

Okay, as to GingerAlex, my feelings that you were too sharp and biting to Da_..., almost giving me the impression that you were against the blacks, but not a racist since you are a member of a minority that is being discriminated against daily by the real racists who have political and economic power over all the minorities, carried over to your calling GingerAlex names that were derogatory. And it was all connected on the same issues. Later when I read her terrorist stuff I realized that here was an issue that was humungous in its evil proportions. And have since confronted her with my views on what she has done on the forum, and the consequences of it.

If she is just a pig-canine, lying female dog, who is trying to make fools out of us, it doesn't matter because her name and posts are recorded by the War on Terrorism unit of the Home Security. And once that happens, even if it was a joke on her part, which by the way she has not admitted to its being, her life will be compromised in everything she does. She is known to the enforcement authorities and they never forget, and only when she is dead will her files with that agency be archived for good. She is one hell-of-a-fool to do that at this time-line in history. Now, if on the other hand, there is something concrete in what she and her organization is doing, and she is actually recruiting then she is dead anyhow. Her name seems to be Jennifer Lemotte, or something like that from her email address. Does that sound to you like a Spanish name? To me it sounds like an Italian name. Who knows she might be a fascist, or an anarchist. BTW, I never inquired of you what you think of Fascism. If you will, I would like to read someday what you think of that form of gov't that has played a role so prominently in our life times.

Now, as to your husband, IMHO you should not "force" anything. But as his wife you have a right to talk to the doctors who examined him, and then you can verify that what your husband told you is either accurate or not. That he actually was able to put on 20 pounds of weight is good news. In cancer and precancerous conditions, the loss of weight is the clearest indication that the patient is in big trouble with the illness. Most cancer patients, untreated perish from starvation. The bad cells consume all the protein and vitamins that the patient gets from food eaten. So watch his weight closely. And don't forget a phone call or two to the doctors who discovered the tumor.

I hate to say it but Stanley's new scan machine might be something that is even better than the scanner used to detect your husband's tumor. It is sad that it has come to this, i.e., that the Boricua who is a physician and has the latest technology is like an enemy to you. Why to you, I can't understand? To me his being a political enemy I can understand, since he is a virulent anti-communist and red-baiter. However, he has had some of his fangs filed-down by me, and parts of it removed by his debate with Comrade Jaakko and other Commies on the Politicsforum.com.

It seems he will never understand communism nor our freedom and sure freedom, and that is why he resorts to religionism and faith (hypocrite that he is} in order to fill in the dots. It is all trumped up by him and totally non-valid.

[Suki]

Eddie,
Yes I had read the Ginger person's weird posts. She is totally into violence. And confessed her father beat up her mother while she was growing up. Now, she has made very discriminatory remarks about 'non-Americans' such as Filipinos and others...about getting the hell out of the USA if you don't like it...and other fascist commentary of that nature. I read all that before the Da_Realest commentary of yours. I also happen to think I know DaRealest from another African forum. And I know he likes putting down minorities that are not Afro-American for kicks. I have no anger against Afro-Americans. In fact Corvo is an African studies expert. El Negrito is also black. And I love African cultural studies. El Negrito, Corvo, and Joshue who is mulatto boricua all find him arrogant and narrow minded. And they are all black men living in America. So, if I have issues with DaRealest I think I am justified. I think you came in cold to the thread and just read a little of Darealest and not all his nonsense posts in their entirety like I have been doing. I recognize his style from an African board. I love going and learning about cultural things.

I talked to my husband last night. I wish you could meet him or talk to him over the phone like Letty has. He is such a gentleman and so easy to talk to. Anyway, he is a bit stubborn. Or let us tell the truth. Very stubborn. Lol. And I got him to agree to see various doctors. I feel relief now. Mom is doing so well. She is involved in a project now with a lot of enthusiasm, and typing away on proposals for funding. And wants to travel with us to Yucatan later on in the year. I want her to have a good time. She deserves it. I hope she does not read this, (I want to surprise her). I find the communist forum on politics.org very informative and dynamic.

In terms of fascism Eddie. Ask away any specifics. I will answer those too. Thank you for your excellent suggestions. I won't force the issue. I will call los doctores instead and make it seem like it was all his idea. You know nosotras las mujeres somos buenas haciendolos pensar que fueron ustedes que iniciaron todo...lol.

You are not timid or shy at all are you Eddie....

[Eddier1]

Originally posted by Suki
Eddie,
Yes I had read the Ginger person's weird posts. She is totally into violence. And confessed her father beat up her mother while she was growing up. Now, she has made very discriminatory remarks about 'non-Americans' such as Filipinos and others...about getting the hell out of the USA if you don't like it...and other fascist commentary of that nature. I read all that before the Da_Realest commentary of yours. I also happen to think I know DaRealest from another African forum. And I know he likes putting down minorities that are not Afro-American for kicks. I have no anger against Afro-Americans. In fact Corvo is an African studies expert. El Negrito is also black. And I love African cultural studies. El Negrito, Corvo, and Joshue who is mulatto boricua all find him arrogant and narrow minded. And they are all black men living in America. So, if I have issues with DaRealest I think I am justified. I think you came in cold to the thread and just read a little of Darealest and not all his nonsense posts in their entirety like I have been doing. I recognize his style from an African board. I love going and learning about cultural things.

I talked to my husband last night. I wish you could meet him or talk to him over the phone like Letty has. He is such a gentleman and so easy to talk to. Anyway, he is a bit stubborn. Or let us tell the truth. Very stubborn. Lol. And I got him to agree to see various doctors. I feel relief now. Mom is doing so well. She is involved in a project now with a lot of enthusiasm, and typing away on proposals for funding. And wants to travel with us to Yucatan later on in the year. I want her to have a good time. She deserves it. I hope she does not read this, (I want to surprise her). I find the communist forum on politics.org very informative and dynamic.

In terms of fascism Eddie. Ask away any specifics. I will answer those too. Thank you for your excellent suggestions. I won't force the issue. I will call los doctores instead and make it seem like it was all his idea. You know nosotras las mujeres somos buenas haciendolos pensar que fueron ustedes que iniciaron todo...lol.

You are not timid or shy at all are you Eddie....

No, not really timid nor shy; what ever gave you the impression that I might be? LOL

Well coming right out with it, as is my wont, I think that Da_Realest is not arrogant, but that he is narrow-minded and even closed-minded is probable. To be arrogant, he would have had to show on the forum that he thinks that he is superior to everyone else there, and by 'ende' condescending towards them. That he has not shown; he has remained remarkably calm in the face of a storm of criticism that has come upon him for his errors about Puertorriquenos.

Heck, I have discussed with Blacks in other forums, where they mostly will unleash a string of Mother F.uckers, and white co.ck suckers etc. at those who criticize them on the issue of racism. Bleep, bleep, bleep...is generally their modus operandi, just like in the ghettos and streets where they live and hang-out. One hears that all the time and on the Forums, too. Another thing I have noticed and this includes whites also, is that if they have been treated harshly at work or any other place, they come home to take it out on their wives and children. Yes, their own families, and applying that to Da_realest, perhaps one can say that he wants to kick around another minority group for what has happened to him and his group. Hell, he is treating the Puertorriquenos as FAMILY in that sense. Poor guy, give him a good meal and lots of patience and he will come back to his senses, just as the whites do in their contratiempos with their families.

Great to hear that your Mom is doing so well!!! And yes it is diplomatic of you to tell your husband that you said you had his approval when calling the doctors. If he says, when did I say that, or no I don't think so...you can tell him you thought he did. A little white lie never hurt anybody. And most important you will get the data you need to take charge with confidence.

Fascism, you responded, well I suppose the point-blank question should be what do you opine about Adolf Hitler as a one-man ruler over everything in a gov't that is fascist? I won't ask you about fascist ideology, because I am certain that fascism is not an ideology; it is merely a form of gov't. There is no real fascist philosophy like there is a communist philosophy.

I know the fascists resort to the writings of the "crazy one" Nietzsche, but he was never a philosopher, but a social commentator on the ordinary man of the street, and even their guttersnipe views and pretensions to be super thugs, which the Nazi translated as the Superman or Master Race. How pathetic, eh?

C ya' later on this evening Suki, if you wish.

[Suki]

Suki,
Well when you mentioned the Ghetto and vulgar language etc. It made me think of Stanley's thread that Letty erased. Stanley said I was a ghetto lowlife and etc. I found it funny. I mean first I am a burguesa and then I am a lumpen from el caserio. Lol. He is all confused.

Now, domestic violence is part and parcel of people feeling powerless and exploited at their work places. But not only that. It is also a symptom of losing control. You mentioned your Dad taking you out to the woodshed and beating the tar out of you as was the custom and how he grew up to discipline you. These parenting classes we have to attend...my husband and I, they talk about all these issues. Me, I can count on one hand the amount of times I was spanked by my parents. My mother only ever hit my sister and I.....once....one time. And I remember it clear as a bell because it was the rarest thing in the world. I bet she does not remember. But, my sis and I were fighting in Puerto Rico in the back of the volky and mom was driving us to the grocery store. I must have been 4 and my sister almost 7 years old. And we were bickering loudly and hitting each other in the back seat (I don't remember what the issue of contention was), but mami kept saying "Callense, que me estan volviendo loca con tanta gritaera." She told us to stop fighting three times. On the fourth she did not say anything....she pulled the volky over and took my sister and I's heads and then banged them together and we both started crying and she said, "Ahora si tienen algo pa estar llorando y gritando je!! Con el chichon en la cabeza van a poder dejar de gritar." Alma got into more trouble than me usually. Era mas traviesa. But corporal punishment was so rare Eddie. And light. Two smacks on the bottom and a regano y mas nada. And a while later, all was ok again. It was very rare that Papi would use that and only when we were little and what he said was the stage of 'lack of reason'. Lol.

I have many more good memories. So many. He used to like my salads that I would proudly present to him for him to eat...when I was six years old or so. I would make them colorful with red beets, and yellow corn, and peas, and carrots and lettuce and tomato...and the reddest red vinegar and olive oil....I loved the color of it all. And he would sit there and say, "Que ensalada mas preciosa Vida. Lo hicistes todo por mi verdad?" and I would say, "Si, todo para ti Papi." And he would eat it all. My mom would read me stories of Hector and Achilles and the battle of Troy and Sparta....she would make it so interesting....and bring me books to color the characters in. I would ask why the males in the Roman times wore dresses and she would explain they weren't dresses but Togas. And how nice the Mediterranean climate was, and that would lead to questions about geography...and so on. In the parenting class....people that start talking about so many sad things....unknown fathers. Drug addicted mothers. So much struggle. I experienced some pain and things. But I was so fortunate Eddie. So fortunate.

My parents grew up dirt poor. And in ghettos. My father by his widowed mom...and his brothers were at least twenty or so years older than he. He was el regalon sorpresa at the end. But both had insatiable desire to learn and do something to better the community. That social consciousness spark and motivation. I see that in you too Eddie. They studied. And worked. And never were class conscious, how could they be? Si ellos eran pobres siempre. Pero pobres con educacion...Eddie. Y con inteligencia y espiritu de lucha. That is a threatening thing in this society. Poor people with experience of poverty, working class identities and educations and knowledge and a thirst for social justice. Also something I see in you too. The rich and the middle class....they just want to keep the status quo. And they suck up to whoever. But the proletariat with experiences and education and consciencia. They are the ones that make things happen. That is my opinion.

Hey, fascism. Germany was ripe historically for what happened. Too much neglected sectors there. After losing in WWI and the German economy in shambles, and Germany not having the siphoned off wealth and colonial exploitation histories of Imperial countries of Europe like England, Spain and France....and the German working class thirsty for justice of some sort.....manipulation again of feelings of nationalism, and of being 'kicked around' by the victor countries in WWI....plus many other things. I know Hitler went after the Communists with a vengeance....for they were the voice of reason, organization and would never have gone for the wholesale genocide and for state sponsored capitalism and priveleges and Master Race theories of his.

Hitler, though, was efficient, organized and since he was Commander and Chief, and he ruled fascist style. No voices of dissent. And kill off the opposition. Many thoughts I have of him....I think he was an opportunist. Not brilliant but clever. And no single person causes the murder of millions. It is done as a society with the consent of many. That is what many don't get.

I think the Red Army with their sacrifices stopped that German madness. And I am deeply grateful they did. It was a terrible price to pay. I hope the future generations make better choices and honor their deaths.

I love talking to you like this Eddie.

C ya later too brigadista

Suki