True Friendship

[nrforor]

Come on Caballeros, can a man truly be friends with a woman? Can a simple and honest relationship exsist between us? Can friendship be respected and honored enough to withstand even the insecurities of our current partners? You know how our beautiful culture can be when it comes to "Amigos and Amigas. This spanish-brown eyed woman would like to know your input.

[eoliveras_sr]

YOUR QUESTION HAS MANY ANSWERS,FIRST HOW MANY MEN CAN SAY THEY HAVE FEMALE FREINDS
WITHOUT THEIR BETTER HALF THINKING
THAT IT IS MORE THAN FREINDSHIP.SAME GOES FOR THE WOMEN.
WE ALL TEND TO SEE BLINDLY WHEN WE MALE/OR FEMALE SAY WE HAVE OPPOSITE SEX FREINDS.
UNLESS YOU TRULY KEEP IT A FREINDSHIP,SOME WOULD SAY THAT YOU ARE DATING.WE ALL HAVE TO BE HONEST WITH EACH OTHER,AND SAY THAT A FREIND IS JUST THAT A FREIND.
WE LATINOS HAVE A TENDENCY TO THINK THE OPPOSITE.

[nrforor]

First of all Hola! Thanks for your reply. I agree with what you are saying, but I find myself a little confused. You say that we must keep it honest"THAT A FRIEND IS JUST A FRIEND", Well, how much more honest can that be, when the friend is truly just a friend?

It's funny, that when we present our true friend to our current beaus, they see something ugly right away and the drama begins. What do we do? Do we put an end to someone whom you truly care for. Because friends do care for each other, believe it or not, or do we kill something, that you know is one of the best gift from God, to satisfy someone who just might not be there when push comes to shove? Let me known.

[rolandoq]

My ex-girlfriend had a lot of male friends since she was always hanging out at the clubs here in NYC and one night she got drunk and she came home very late the next day.
The guy she was with was one of this guys that loves to brag about physical conquest of new women so I herd about it.
It completely caught me of guard but I know God was looking out for me cause that relationship was doomed from the start since her mom was very predjudice.
She eventually admited to it and I told her she had to move out cause I do not tolerate weakness. My point is that if you are going to have male friends and a man in your life then you have to be mentally ready for that challenge since what happen to my ex can happen to anyone.
The same goes for men so there is no difference and I understand when your mate complaints about a friendship since there is always the possibility.
I have female friends that i work out with, some are out of this state since I do a lot of traveling but I can honestly say that when I'm with someone is all or none.
Drop me a line if you wish to continue chating.

[nrforor]

Hola Rolandoq,
Sorry about what your ex did to you. But from what I read, it seems to me that she didn't have any friends at all, but just a lot of pals. You see, if she did have a real friend the night that she got drunk, he would had done the right thing and made sure that she had gotton home safe. If she still feels that she has friends, ask her if she knows the difference between a pal and a friend. It seems to me that she was surrounded by a lot of pals and nothing else.

Stay in touch.

[rolandoq]

Nrforor thank you for your quick reply and yes maybe you are right however, what is the difference between a friend and a pal.
Unfortunately me and her do not comunicate at all, the friendship that I tought we had went sour grapes after that, I lost respect for her and she felt I should accepted what she did and move on so now there is no respect and I truly do not like the way she acts.
I have too much going on in my life, I'm doing very well to accept anything other than what I deserve if and if a woman wants to be with me then she will have to be with me only.
I guess I'm kind of old fashion but there is no way I'm going to stay with a woman after she gets intimate with someone else, i do not care if she is drunk, the bottom line is she should not had gotten that way.
As I also mentioned, her mother was racist and I'm negrito and she is half italiana and another thing was that she was always going out with her friends who by the way are all either divorced or single.
It takes two special individuals to be able to be friends and respect one another if either one is involved then the other should accept that and look out for that special friend.
That word FRIEND is something a lot of people this day and age know nothing about, I would never disrespect a friend to the poit where I would compromise them in any way.
Write back and let me know what you think.

[nrforor]

Rolandoq, what you said is very true. A woman should never get drunk, especially out in public, to a point where you don't have any control or can lose control. If she feels that you should accept it and move on, then yes do move on but with out her. If she can't respect or demand respect for herself, then who is she to respect or consider anyone else. You say that her mother is a racist, well then it sure refected on her daughter. My grandmother, whom raised me, would also tell me, that when I'm out doing whatever that I'm doing, remember that I'm representing her. That people judge you be your upbringing, and that they judge her. With that in mind, I made it my business to never do anything that would embarrass the one woman that, I feel,embodies what a latina woman should be.
Among the many consejos, that she would give me, there was one that comes in handy. Never allow anyone to take away the one thing that distinguishes you from the rest. EL RESPETO, TU RESPETO. You are right, you shouldn't take less than what you deserve. Don't ever let anyone take away what distinguish from the rest. It is her loss.
As for her always having male friends that were single or divorced, then that in itself shows that she was being very selective. She didn't want other females in the picture or getting all of the attention.

With friends like that who needs enemies. And yes, friends should respect the fact that you are involved. In fact, they should make the person, who you are involved with feel as comfortable and secure as possible.

From your replies, you seem to be a strong latino man, that just won't cross certain lines in life. Good quality, don't lose it.
Siempre, Spanish Eyes.