How I hate cupid

[hvalentin5349]

Originally Posted by Delgado22

And stop whining. You make me sick just reading your posts and I'm two years younger than you. I know how you feel, but cut out the crybaby routine, dude -- nobody wants to read that. That's the other reason you get treated the way you do by women -- they see that from a mile away and won't take you seriously (nor want to pursue a relationship with you) BECAUSE of that.

So coje tus cajones and get back to being a man... lol

I do not talk about this with anyone. Women cannot see this from a mile away because I NEVER talk about this in public.I never talk about this with anyone. Never. One of the reasons that people come to online forums like these is because here one can talk about stuff that is private and personal. My beliefs inso much as how to treat a women are private. I never whine to anyone. I bearly talk to anyone at all. If you were to see me you would not like me off the bat since I have a poker face ( so I have been told ) and I am not exactly Mr. Sunshine. Some people tell me that I intimadate women because I look so damn serious ( could be ). This forum is a stress reliever for me. Its here were I get all the $hit out of me. (The gym helps too ). This is stuff that I do not talk about with others in "real life" .

Anways , thanks for the advice , but I disagree. I have been treated by women because I have been too nice. Too much of a gentlemen. I still believe that If I would of acted more like a jerk I would not of had my heart crushed. I am going to be an @sshole from now on!!!!!

[Colorblind]

Originally Posted by hvalentin5349

Well , I suppose you could say that I have created my own misery perhaps. But on the other hand , maybe the problem with this women is that I was too nice to her , too much of a gentlemen. I should of taken the advice that I have heard on many occasions : Never be too good to a women. She will crush your heart when she knows that you like her or are in love with her. I was thinking about this last night. I have realized that when ever there is a girl that I like and I treat her the way a women says that they want to be treated ( gentlemen , caring sweet , attentive , bla , bla , bla ) I get nothing except for a crushed heart. Yet , the few times when I act like a arrogant jerk , like a man who does not give a damn about any women - all of the sudden the women in question wants to be with me , they start going after me. When I was an undergraduate I had a roomate that had women all over him , and these were some nice looking , smart girls too. I asked him how does he do it. "Simple" , he said , "never be too good with them , never treat them like you care. To get a women to love you you have to be an @sshole" " The problem with you is" , he told me " that you are too nice , too much of a gentlemen" Thinking about it he was right. It makes me sad to know that a women will never be attracted to my good side becuase it turns them off ( good and nice = wimp ). I really am a pretty nice person. So from now on I wil have to act like a jerk to attract women. I guess its the only thing that will keep them coming back for more.

OK, now that I've written to you from a spiritual standpoint. It's time to break it down - from my own POV. (point of view) All this mess about a woman (the key word is woman) wanting to be treated bad is a load of crap.
Don't get me wrong, there are some females out there that get off on that. But, those individuals are ignorant and don't know any other way. 9 times out of 10 that female did not grow up around a positive male role model. You need to stay away from those types instead of pursuing a relationship with them. If a female is not used to being or feeling loved then they are going to desire the jerk; (Been there done that) However, that does not give you an excuse to treat any women like that. You might end up w/ bodily harm. (Hell hath no fury , like a woman scorned) So, if your new outlook on life is to be the "playa" then I feel really sorry for you. Prepare yourself Hvalentin, to be labeled a "dog".... Now, is that what you really want? Sincerely think about that.

Originally Posted by Colorblind

OK, now that I've written to you from a spiritual standpoint. It's time to break it down - from my own POV. (point of view) All this mess about a woman (the key word is woman) wanting to be treated bad is a load of crap.
Don't get me wrong, there are some females out there that get off on that. But, those individuals are ignorant and don't know any other way. 9 times out of 10 that female did not grow up around a positive male role model. You need to stay away from those types instead of pursuing a relationship with them. If a female is not used to being or feeling loved then they are going to desire the jerk; (Been there done that) However, that does not give you an excuse to treat any women like that. You might end up w/ bodily harm. (Hell hath no fury , like a woman scorned) So, if your new outlook on life is to be the "playa" then I feel really sorry for you. Prepare yourself Hvalentin, to be labeled a "dog".... Now, is that what you really want? Sincerely think about that.

Exactly....

[Colorblind]

Originally Posted by Delgado22

(Note: few to no women who are actually physically attractive SEEK to be "good" early in life, so the few women who claim they're not after the bad boy types first are either not attractive or lying.)

Colorblind can probably relate to all of what I'm saying, porque YO SE que tengo razon. She may have baggage and self-esteem issues at first, maybe not -- but the bottom line is, she'll be loyal and faithful to you and LOVE YOU WITH ALL HER HEART because she'll know she's BLESSED to be with a man who will give her all those things back.

Young - yet full of God's wisdom. It's true, early in life I went after the "hot" boys. Of course - they ended up using me. But, you live and learn. I'm just soooo thankful for deliverance.

Si, hermano. I can totally relate to what you're saying. I had to start all over again when I received Christ. I'm still learning allot. Especially how to be a virtuous woman. But, I know one thing. The covering that God has in store for me is going to be a blessed man.

Stay up Delgado. Continue to seek Him 1st and your Boricua queen will be presented to you soon!

Originally Posted by Colorblind

Young - yet full of God's wisdom. It's true, early in life I went after the "hot" boys. Of course - they ended up using me. But, you live and learn. I'm just soooo thankful for deliverance.

Si, hermano. I can totally relate to what you're saying. I had to start all over again when I received Christ. I'm still learning allot. Especially how to be a virtuous woman. But, I know one thing. The covering that God has in store for me is going to be a blessed man.

Stay up Delgado. Continue to seek Him 1st and your Boricua queen will be presented to you soon!

Amen! I will, Colorblind. I'd have it no other way at this point. Tried to do it outside of His will for too long, now it's time to go all out and do it His way when it comes to relationships. I definitely will continue seeking the Lord first in all things and that reina will be added unto me. And may God do the same for you, hermana..

[_Rico_]

Originally Posted by hvalentin5349

Here I am again , another rant , another venting

Well for those of you who visit the post , you will know that I have been after some girl where I work. In some previuos posts I have stated that I was unsure if she liked me the way I do. Well , I was realing starting to get into this girl as you all know , some of you gave me some good advice. Some of it I followed and sme of it I did not. Anyways , I am feeling a bit sad and angry right now ( hence the rant ) becuase I have relaized that this girl I was going gaga over does not really like me at all. Come to think about it she was just teasing me. She had been giving me quite a few signs that she was interested in me. I saw them clearly but I was not sure if my eyes were playing tricks on me. Anyways after some thought I figured that she was interested in so I started talking to her. We would talk a lot and we even went out on a date of sorts. I discovered that we had a lot on commen. I began to establish a raport with this women and was hoping that it might develop into something more. I have already asked her out again - twice - and she said no twice ( " soooo much work to do ). This of course is her way of saying " I am not interested in you" . Now I dont get it , why has she suddenly lost interest in me? Why is she now ignoring me? This has to be one of those mind games that women play. She does not like me and knows that I like her so she starts to tease me a little. Perhaps this has to do with the fact that she broke up with her boyfrind not too long ago and she is seeing if she can use me a as a crutch , as a spare tire so to speak. I went over to talk to her today and she basicaly ignore me so the message there is clear. Perhaps she was only tasing me to make herself feel better (" Yes ! I can still get a guys attention" ). Women plays these games you know. Anyways , I am going to start ignoring the little prick , too. Just to see how she likes it. We men often say amongs ourselves that the best way to get a women's attention is to ignore her. That drives them crazy. Well , two can play at that game. You know , this really makes me sad and also it ticks me off. Everytime a women shows interest in me it seems to quickly die off when I start to talk to her. Perhasp I was chasing her a bit too much. Perhasp she wanted me to be more aggressive. I don't know. But who understands women? I just want to met a women fall in love with her ( and her wit me ) , then get married and have children. I'm 28. I want to get married before I am 35. I dislike the idea of spending my life alone. What do women want?????? ( Its a rethorical question , God himself has not gotten that far ). I must be honest and say that I have never has much luck with women - although they seem to flirt with me like there is no tomorrow. I do not mean to sound arrogant but some women friends of mine said some time ago that I am a good looking guy and that a lot of women might flirt just because they want to see what I will do - they might not take me very seriously since they think that must be like a sailor - a women at every port. This is very not true. I have the worst of luck with women. You wuold not believe how bad I am at talking to ones that I am attracted to , when I ask one out you should see me: I can talk my butt off with my platonin women friends. but if there is a women I like I get nervous , I start to sweat and sometimes my tongue gets tied and I dont know what to say. Than I end up feeling like an true pendej###. Its very funny. Yes , I know , I sound like a wimp. But these are things that I never talk about with anyone. Never. If you were to met me in person I would come off as not very talkative and more on the shy side- which is how I am. I am not one big on parties and such. Its wierd , for the most part I am a confident person , I feel like I can walk on water. But when it comes to talking up a women my nerves go beserk and I sweat a lot. Anyways , this little expericnce also backs up a previous belief that I have had for some time - a man should never be too good with a women . I should have followed that advice a heard a long time ago. With women , you've got to be hijo de la gran put@. I guess thats the only way she will ever love you. In retrospect , that seems to work. When I chase a women , she cra#$ on me. When I ignore her then they come after me??? Is there some " "How to treat a women" book on this that I don't about ? Yup , I will just start ignoring this little tease and see if she likes it.

I am just sad and angry that this has happened to me - again , and again and again. This just makes more bitter and distrustful of women. I am not gay but I hourbor a lot of resentment and distrust towards women.

OK , my rant is over. I got that off my chest.

Listen the reason she didn't want to go out with you is because something you said or did when you guys went out made her lose interest. Also, the reason she was "teasing" you was because women in general love the attention that men give them, after probably getting dumped by her man, she needed to feel attractive so she let you give her that attention to make her feel that way, which is pretty selfish to not consider your feelings, and I don't know about you, but I don't like selfish people(especially women) so you saved yourself from wasting your time in a relationship with a selfish woman.

Also, you have to change your mindset man, you keep thinking "how can I get with this girl?" or "how do I get her to like me?" You can't think that way. For instance, whenever I go out to meet women, I have the mentality that I am their dream man, they need me more than I need them, and it is up to me whether I will give them that chance to get with me. If I feel she may be worth it, then I will go give a female a chance to know me, if she is smart then she'll take that chance, if she is stupid then she won't, and i'm not attracted to stupidity so it works out fine for me. Can you understand where I am coming from hvalentin5349? An example was this weekend when I went up to his fine looking boricua to start up some small talk, she thought I was just another black guy, didn't show me no interest, but then when my friend mentioned I was Puerto Rican, all of a sudden she had interest in getting know me, but as soon as I saw that I said to her "well it was nice talking to you, but I have to go now" and just walked away to talk to other women, and she kept staring at me for the rest of the night waiting for me to go talk to her again, but I wasn't interested anymore. You have to start doing the same and not waste your time with chicas that aren't worthy of you. Otherwise you are going to keep putting yourself in this position.

Originally Posted by _Rico_

Listen the reason she didn't want to go out with you is because something you said or did when you guys went out made her lose interest. Also, the reason she was "teasing" you was because women in general love the attention that men give them, after probably getting dumped by her man, she needed to feel attractive so she let you give her that attention to make her feel that way, which is pretty selfish to not consider your feelings, and I don't know about you, but I don't like selfish people(especially women) so you saved yourself from wasting your time in a relationship with a selfish woman.

Also, you have to change your mindset man, you keep thinking "how can I get with this girl?" or "how do I get her to like me?" You can't think that way. For instance, whenever I go out to meet women, I have the mentality that I am their dream man, they need me more than I need them, and it is up to me whether I will give them that chance to get with me. If I feel she may be worth it, then I will go give a female a chance to know me, if she is smart then she'll take that chance, if she is stupid then she won't, and i'm not attracted to stupidity so it works out fine for me. Can you understand where I am coming from hvalentin5349? An example was this weekend when I went up to his fine looking boricua to start up some small talk, she thought I was just another black guy, didn't show me no interest, but then when my friend mentioned I was Puerto Rican, all of a sudden she had interest in getting know me, but as soon as I saw that I said to her "well it was nice talking to you, but I have to go now" and just walked away to talk to other women, and she kept staring at me for the rest of the night waiting for me to go talk to her again, but I wasn't interested anymore. You have to start doing the same and not waste your time with chicas that aren't worthy of you. Otherwise you are going to keep putting yourself in this position.

There you go H. Valentin... someone else who says the exact same thing I do... believe me, you don't have to tell the women anything, they can discern what's going on with you through body language and how you speak -- and can tell what your mindset is...